Thursday, April 2, 2009

First Annual Cluster F%#@ Competition

Well, it’s official – The past week and a half have sucked harder than a Hoover on shag carpeting. Everyone I talk to, from co-workers to old friends, seem to be caught in some whirling tornado of chaos that is driving them mad.

So in honor of the earth being off its axis (and my friend Maggie for using the phrase “cluster f%#@” in an e-mail to me) I have decided to have the First Annual Cluster F%#@ Competition.

The rules are simple: In the comments section tell me why the past 10-14 days of your life have been hell on earth. The winner won’t actually be the person who submits the most pathetically depressing story, but those of us who can sigh at the realization that someone out there has a life in a deeper bit is crap than our own.

And let me just tell you there is already some stiff competition out there; from relatives dealing with inept mortgage brokers, friends having witnessed the aftermath of someone who thought they could fly off the 40th floor of the Civic Opera House, to co-workers threatening to drink themselves into an early grave if it will stop the procession of idiots they deal with on a daily basis.

I’d say things can only get better from here but I’d probably be cursing myself and all of humanity with a dumb statement like that. So I’ll save us the impending Armageddon and keep my mouth shut.

~The Office Scribe

3 comments:

Kimberly said...

Come on, people. Start posting. I just hate my job and I came here to read some stuff to make me feel better.
Get cracking.

The Office Scribe said...

Give people time. They have to come in off the ledge in order to type...

Don't you have a story to share?

Suzi said...

Wow - well its been a hectic week at work with people out of the office and all. Aside from that I am cramming to get a ridiculously tedious paper done for class - which i began yesterday - and is due Tuesday. On top of moving last weekend, not being able to find anything in my apartment all week. . . Oh, and my car is posessed! My locks were locking and unlocking themselves on my way to work this morning. Is it a full moon or something????