Thursday, April 8, 2010

Under The Desk With The Office Scribe – An Interview With the Unfinished Rambler...or Person

Apologies all around.  The was supposed to go up on Tuesday, but between a long day at work and the need to get to trivia and finally start drinking again, it didn't.  And then between sketchy internet service and having dinner with my Gram it also didn't happen yesterday.  But I am sober, hungry, was bored at work, and once again have a connection to the outside world, so this shit is getting posted now.

My second guest who agreed to come Under The Desk with me is Unfinished Person.  When I met him, he was going by Unfinished Rambler but he has been changing his name, double posting on Twitter, and generally making me confused as hell.  But all of that aside, I am a fan so I asked him some questions.  Which he was kind enough to answer...

1) Have you ever worked in a cubicle?

Yes.  When I was an intern at a newspaper.  Unfortunately, I was right by the door to the room with all the other cubicles so I couldn't masturbate like I would have liked to have done, if I had been hidden in the back somewhere.

Editor's note:  I am completely freaked out to walk into the cubicles of the people who are hidden in corners.  Thanks UP!

2) You seem to have somewhat of a split personality (something I have noticed on Twitter).  Do you have any other mental conditions I should know about?

I don't just have two personalities.  I actually have 27.

3) I notice that you read a lot.  What is your favorite book that doesn't contain illustrations or a "turn to page..." scenario at the bottom of each page.

A Prayer for Owen Meany by John Irving

4) I gave up liquor for Lent.  You gave up candy.  What is the hardest thing you have ever given up because of God?

Candy

5) Do you have scented candles in your bathroom?

Um, no.  I am a heterosexual male and even though my wife is a heterosexual female, I don't allow that in our bathroom.  We don't need it anyway, because my shit smells like roses.  Really.

6) We met because of the now defunct Humor-Blogs.com which means we both think we are funny.  Do you have a favorite humorist?

Dave Barry

7) There is a lot of information about you on your blog.  What is a secret you are willing to share, here, for the first time?

I am 5-foot-7.

8) Does that little smiley face on your blog mean anything?

Well, even though I recently received a fortune cookie recently that said, "You are a happy man," that's not what it means.  What is really means is that WordPress.com likes to put shit (and it's not rose scented either, those bastards) on my blog that I can't figure out how to take off, and by the time I figure it out, I'll be gone to WordPress.org.  True story:  See designer Chris Pearson's answers about 20 comments down on this post:  http://www.pearsonified.com/2009/04/feldman-interview.php

Editor's note: That link may, or may not, bring you to a NSFW website.  I am afraid to click on it so I am no help.

9) Coke or Pepsi?

Pepsi is the answer I give when family is around because my late grandfather worked for Pepsi and most of the time, that's true except on nights like tonight (when I'm answering these questions) when I'm drinking Crown Royal and Coke or other nights not like tonight when I'm drinking Captain and Coke.

Editor's Note:  I read "Crown Royal" as "Royal Crown" and spent 5 minutes trying to figure out why someone would mix two colas together...

Oh, and for the record, these answers are from Unfinished Rambler.  Unfinished Person is too much of a pussy to tell it like it is; I'm not.

Well said my friend, well said....


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~ The Office Scribe

* Feel like you have what it takes to venture under the desk with my extra pair of shoes and a petrified Cheetoh?  Drop me an e-mail or find me on Twitter.

12 comments:

Unfinished Rambler said...

Thanks for "having" me under your desk...well, not "having" me, but you know what I mean. Thanks again. It was fun. I'll have to have you stop by my blog in the near future.

Ed said...

good stuff scribe

I'll have to check this dude out.

Meeting said...

Interesting post. Of course I still think you haven't addressed the elephant in the room. Namely that you haven't interviewed @MeetingBoy yet. I assume you're building up to that.

Moooooog35 said...

I'll take an interview but don't ask me what I've given up for God because I've pretty much given up giving up things for God to give..up..giving...um...

I forgot where I was going with this.

Lisa @ Boondock Ramblings said...

I'm serious...he does think he is two people. We, as his family, are soon staging an intervention to help get him into some serious therapy. Shhh...don't tell him I told you this!

Jaffer said...

Heh heh … love Dave Barry … I’m usually seen browsing through his books at the library

It’s ok to mix two colas just for the weirdness.

- came here via unfinished person.

A Vapid Blonde said...

Hmmm a pepsi cheater is a sexy coke drinker for sure! Also...I am now glad I don't work in a room with cubicles anymore.

ReformingGeek said...

Thanks for the great interview. Mr. Unfinished is hilarious!

Shieldmaiden96 said...

This is the Unfinished Wife, just to testify that our marked lack of scented candles in the bathroom and elsewhere is owing less to our vigorous heterosexuality and more to the fact that we have a cat too dumb not to stick his face in a candle just to see what all that brightness and warmth is about.

MikeWJ at Too Many Mornings said...

Insightful.

Maybe.

Depends on how much of it is true. The Internet can't be trusted.I think the bit about the cubicle is probably true. And half the bit about Pepsi.

Erika said...

You know, I also read that as "Royal Crown" but somehow my mind still went to liquor.....and it's inspired me to make myself a rum and coke......this might indicate a larger problem?

Unfinished Rambler said...

Sorry so late on my responses here:

Ed: Thanks. I'll have to "check" you out too. :)

Meeting: You're such a social media whore. ;)

Moooooger: I don't know where you were going with that, but I'm sure it was funny.

Lisa: Um, I read this, you know.

Jaffer: I don't mix the colas. Ewwww.

Vapidity: I'm with you on the cubicles too. Scary (sorry, Scribe :).

Reffie: Right back at ya, babe. :)

Wife: It's true.

Mike: All the Pepsi and Coke stuff is true.

Erika: I hope you have an AA nearby. :)