There is nothing like getting in your car in the morning and before you back all the way out of your parking space the little light comes on indicating that if you don't stop and get gas you won't make it to work. Which means you won't get paid. Which means you won't be able to afford food. Which means you'll lose like 50 pounds. Which means you decide to become a model. Which means you become rich and famous. Which means you have "friends" who hand you coke. Which means you lose another 50 pounds. Which means you end up losing your modeling contract. Which means you eventually start turning tricks.
So like I said, not filling up your car with gas will turn you into a drug addled prostitute.
And since I like not, to quote Bob Saget, "to suck dick for coke" I stopped by the BP this morning and got some gas. As I was pulling out of the station I noticed another car that was leaving still had his gas cap unscrewed. So I thought "I'll be nice" and pulled in front of his car to prevent his exit and rolled down my window. The funny thing is the guy looked freaked when I pulled in front of his car, like I was going to Mad Max his ass. But he was genuinely happy that I told him about his gas cap and the two of us went on our way.
Fast forward 8 hours...
I had just pulled back into my parking spot after a LONG day at the office. I grabbed my bad and trudged into my building. I had just closed my door and threw the dead bolt when someone knocked. It was one of my neighbors, with my work key card which had fallen out of my pocket in the parking lot, in hand.
How awesome is that? This happy little story proves two things:
1) I am not always a cynical bitch
2) That kid should stick to seeing dead people
What? You thought I was going to say something about karma, didn't you.
~ The Office Scribe
"If it's not your butt, don't touch it"
1 month ago