I am not sure what really lead to this conversation, but the preferred form for fighting within my department is now Windmill Fighting.
While it might sound like a lost Kung Fu style, or like something out of a Cervates novel, it's much simpler than that.
Basically, you attack someone with flailing arms, much like a windmill, and hope that you eventually hit the intended target.
Sounds juvenile, but to quote South Park, "Simpson's did it".
* Bart is using the style on the left, while Lisa prefers another method.
So whenever someone is challenged about anything in my department, the other person invokes the following sentence:
Shall we settle this Windmill Style?
So far no one has actually taken anyone up on the challenge (possibly because someone in my department is 6'3" and has a reach much longer than anyone else...)
But one day, arguments will be settled this way.
I guarantee it.
~ The Office Scribe
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